I’ve heard fishermen always add a couple of centimeters to their catch. I’ve even heard rumors that some guys may add a bit of extra length when boasting about bodily features that are measured in centimetres.
I think men in particular have something like an in-built exaggerator when they talk to their mates about all kind of stuff. Surfing does not seem to be any different. I’ve heard countless conversation, guys getting all excited talking about their latest session when it was in fact really not that great.
Here are some of my favourites:
- “So much fun, there were heaps of close-out barrels on the shore”. That really stands for “mean shore dump” i.e. taking off on the shorey, getting dumped before you eat sand.
- “It was much bigger than Bondi and awesome lefts in that rip bowl.” That something like…I had to drive for 2 hours to get 2ft surf instead of 1.5ft and you had to paddle like a mad man to stay in the right spot.
- “Indo was massive. It was easily double overhead on the sets.” Well, well, technically that could be true…generally you tend to surf bigger waves in Indo than you do in Bondi for example…and it’s much easier just because it’s so consistent and perfect and you know they are holding up. Having said that, I had a good chuckle when a friend came up to me after my recent Indo trip: “Wow, [insert name of mutual friend who was on the same trip] told me you’ve had awesome surf. Pretty massive, hey, wow double-overhead.” In reality, yes it was pretty good size and it was definitely awesome but nowhere close to double-overhead. More like head-high if at all.
- “It was pumping. You had to pick your waves though and you might get a few on the head.” That usually means: “It was one big close-out, I spent more time under water than above the water trying to dodge the big sets and I was lucky enough to catch one wave that was holding up”.
So next time, maybe take it with a grain of salt when your mate tells you it was epic. You might not have to feel too bad after all because you missed that one surf. I’ve got some friends who are notorious for making it sound waaaay better than it actually was. Now, I guess you could choose to be sarcastic about it but actually on the other hand, good on you guys for being absolute frothers. Maybe the excitement gets the better of you. Maybe it’s not about exaggeration at all but just seeing the glass half full…as I always say, who cares, most important thing is you are having fun in the water. Keep the stoke and surf on…